Signs

Sign over a Gynecologist’s Office:
“Dr. Jones, at your cervix.”
~~~~
In a Podiatrist’s office:
“Time wounds all heels.”
~~~~
On a Septic Tank Truck:
Yesterday’s Meals on Wheels
~~~~
At a Proctologist’s door:
“To expedite your visit, please back in.”
~~~~
At an Optometrist’s Office:
“If you don’t see what you’re looking for,
you’ve come to the right place.”
~~~~
On a Plumber’s truck:
“We repair what your husband fixed.”
~~~~
On another Plumber’s truck:
“Don’t sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.”
~~~~
At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee :
“Invite us to your next blowout.”
~~~~
At a Towing company:
“We don’t charge an arm and a leg. We want tows.”
~~~~
On an Electrician’s truck:
“Let us remove your shorts.”
~~~~
In a Non-smoking Area:
“If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.”
~~~~
On a Maternity Room door:
“Push. Push. Push.”
~~~~
On a Taxidermist’s window:
“We really know our stuff.”
~~~~
On a Fence:
“Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive!”
~~~~
At a Car Dealership:
“The best way to get back on your feet – miss a car payment.”
~~~~
Outside a Muffler Shop:
“No appointment necessary. We can hear you coming.”
~~~~
In a Veterinarian’s waiting room:
“Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!”
~~~~
At the Electric Company
“We would be delighted if you send in your payment. However, if you don’t, you will be.”
~~~~
In a Restaurant window:
“Don’t stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up.”
~~~~
In the front yard of a Funeral Home:
“Drive carefully. We’ll wait.”
~~~~
At a Propane Filling Station:
“Thank heaven for little grills.”

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